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  • Writer's pictureMarleen Greenleaf

Top Tips for Asking for What You Want with Confidence


Asking for what you want is more than simply posing a question or making a request. Asking for what you want is packaging a set of well thought out plans, coupled with good timing, confidence, and conviction about what you want all together in one tight package. Asking for what you want with confidence requires you to BE a few things:


  • Be- Prepared and know what you want

  • Be- Aware of your surroundings

  • Be- Confident with your non-verbal body language

  • Be- Ready to defend your request

Being ready when it’s time to ask for what you want makes the process easier and the likelihood you’ll get what you ask for higher. Let’s take a look.


Be prepared and know what you want- If you know what you want and the reasons why, it’s much easier to confidently ask. Some asks don’t need an explanation while others might. Be confident in why you want what you want so you can boldly make the ask regardless of the possible rejection. If you are clear on what you want, your mindset will be in the right space.


Be aware of your surroundings- Timing is everything. When you ask, under what circumstances, and what’s going on at the time can influence the outcomes. Be considerate of the surroundings at the time of your request to make certain you are choosing the right time, location, and circumstances to ask for what you want.


Be confident non-verbally- A significant portion of communication is non-verbal. Your words may convey one thing while your body and eyes may convey another. If you want your ask to be received with confidence, your body language needs to line up with your ask. Look people in the eye, stand up straight, and make certain you are being confident from the inside out.


Be ready to defend your request- Asking for what you want comes with some risk. From turning around a flat-out rejection to defending your ask, you must be prepared to stand up for what you’re asking for. Be ready with facts, reasons, or other information that supports your request so you can educate or persuade if necessary.


Confidently asking for what you want is more than simply making an ask. You’ve got to be confident in what you are asking for, ask for it at the right time, use your non-verbal body language to sell the ask, and defend your request if necessary. Packaging your ask up with these components will help build your confidence and make asking for what you want easier and more successful.


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